Summer Fun

Well it's beginning to look like Summer is here, yay! Hubby is working lots and very long days which is great although sometimes it feel like I never get a break. We finally made a purchase of a new vehicle so I am no longer stuck at home or only with activities within walking distance. Since we have purchased the car I feel like we have been going no stop though catching up on a bunch of visiting and things that have been put off. There is one trip that we haven't made yet and it makes me anxious even thinking about it and discussing it with hubby causes an argument...my dad's.

I have the daughter guilt...it is the worst. I want to go and get it over with but in the same sense I am not looking forward to the lectures I will be getting, cause there is no way they will ever not bitch about how I have not brought my daughter out, how I am still breastfeeding, how we are too overprotective etc. It wouldn't be them if I didn't hear them complaining about how everyone does them wrong.

I also have the wife guilt...do I disrespect my husband wishes because I should have a say too? When his mom was alive we didn't take our daughter there because we didn't want her around the smoke and his mom had stuff laying around that we wouldn't want our daughter to get a hold of, and his mom was more then okay coming to our house, she never once moaned and groaned about coming to our place cause she got to see her granddaughter, yet we get the exact opposite from my family. Not to mention the whole dog thing...hubby is terrified that our wishes won't be respected and that the dogs will be brought out and then we will be leaving on bad terms.

I always feel like I am torn when it comes to this situation, one, I don't want to have to choose, two, I am not a child anymore I don't need to be lectured and three, times have changed, what worked for them and their child (my half brother) is not what I want for my child.

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Overprotective?

Why is it when I don't want to take DD to family members houses or let them babysit (while I go no where) they call me overprotective?  I have no need to leave her with people as this is the reason I chose to be a stay at home mom while I can. She is also only 18 months! Not exactly sleepover age.

 I find it easier to have people over to my place where I know what she is into and I have child locks on everything. She is also at a stage where she is shy around everyone and doesn't want to go to people she rarely sees but I am "spoiling her" or she is being miserable. Let's not forget that I am still breastfeeding and that "should be stopped for everyone sake" even though it is recommended to 2 years and is very good for her health-wise and is only non sociable because people are uneducated.

Some of my family stop visiting because they just forget to stop by, apparently, but if you want to be a part of your granddaughters life why wouldn't you make the effort whether or not it means you have to go out of your way? I am the bad person for not taking her places too when we only have one vehicle and and it's not here most of the time. I can call and ask for rides but then I need the carseat which is in our one vehicle and I don't like to be a bother and when I want to go home I have to wait until whomever is ready.

I feel like it is a constant battle as to what we did when we were being raised and what people did with their kids and well "nothing bad happened to them". Also just cause you won't smoke when she is there the fact that you do smoke in your house means there is nicotine and other toxins on the stuff in your house. I know this as I was a smoker before too, and I don't want my daughter around it, she deserves better then what we had as kids.

I can't wait for the holidays to be over...

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